An Ode to Dr. Alvergue (He/Him) and the Glorious Circus of UW–Eau Claire
LYRICS
At the University of Wisconsin-Eau Claire,
Out on the quad where the bold still dare, under the red-white glare,
College Republicans plant their stand —
Snowflakes melt like they just got banned.
Marchin’ in comes Dr. José Alvergue (He/Him) cancel king in full parade,
Spots a whiff of free speech — SNAPS — launches a woke crusade!
“Conservative trash? Not on MY watch, no way!”
Dr. José Alvergue (He/Him) flips their table — donuts rain like D-Day!
IF WE DON’T LIKE WHAT YOU SAY, WE’LL KICK YOUR ASS, IT’S THE BLUGOLD WAY!
Speak proud? We’ll make you pay!
Blue for the mob, gold for the crown,
Stand for the right? We’ll beat you down!
No cuffs, no perp walk, no shame to see,
Dr. José Alvergue (He/Him) took the backdoor, clean and free.
Administrative leave? Paid or not — who the hell knows?
The cowards in charge hide behind fake shows.
Wave a “Liberty” sticker? You’re enemy one!
But paint “Trump’s a Fascist”? You’re the campus’ golden son!
IF WE DON’T LIKE WHAT YOU SAY, WE’LL KICK YOUR ASS, IT’S THE BLUGOLD WAY!
Say it loud? You’ll rue the day!
Gold for the mob, blue for your tears,
Freedom’s dead — crushed under woke cheers!
Facts get burned, the truth gets tossed,
While Dr. José Alvergue (He/Him) strolls off without a loss.
Admins whine, “He’s just passionate, let it be!”
While liberty rots under the DEI tree.
IF WE DON’T LIKE WHAT YOU SAY, WE’LL KICK YOUR ASS, IT’S THE BLUGOLD WAY!
Right-wingers? You best not stay!
Gold for control, blue for despair,
Speak out once — get crushed by Eau Claire!